Only a few days into November and I’m already faltering on my word count! Since I switched back to the day shift my writing productivity at *ahem* work has dropped significantly. Had I still been on the nightshift I’m sure I would have kept my momentum going, but that isn’t the only problem. I prepared an outline for the first half of my chosen story and I began on November 2nd to write the opening chapters. Then I stopped. I was more in the mood to write about Prohibition and not wanting my blog to go dormant, I worked on that instead.
NaNoWriMo is about writing a 50,000 word novella, but I believe I read that it is acceptable to write 50,000 words of content in general. In the case of Scenes from Prohibition, I don’t think I could wrap up the whole story in a month or 50,000 words. The story is so nonlinear in it’s formation, I would hate to start planning now and end up strangling the project. (Combed the Nano website and found a forum for NanoRebels, people whose project doesn’t follow the basic guidelines. So I’m not alone in not focusing on one project.)
Perhaps planning is my obstacle. I planned too quickly without letting the story begin and inform me where it wanted to go. Now I’ve set up too many barriers and guidelines. It’s restricting. When I wrote Bastion last year, the project was fairly open. Of course, I had had it incubating for months in the back of my mind before I had even heard of NaNoWriMo and I was able to rally despite my late start date. I can still rally now. It’s only the sixth/seventh day yet. I’m only lacking the enthusiasm.
The new project started off well, but then a nagging thought entered my mind. Was I taking too much from my own experience? The plain truth of some of the characters would be extremely harsh for those they were loosely based on. I don’t want to hurt anyone’s feelings even if these are really thoughts that crossed my mind and were based on actual events. Perhaps it’s the fear of that tripping me up.
Fear is ridiculous and it has made me miss far too many opportunities in my lifetime so far. I’ve conquered a major hurdle in the past two years and have made strides to take back the steering wheel from fear. Now it’s sneaking up on me. The fear of failure, the fear of rejection.
Get over yourself! Just write, write about Prohibition, write whatever the hell you want.
Featured Image from ‘Dieter is Lonely,’ by Lahli Trevis. Available on Amazon